Nuclear family - The nuclear family consists of the father, mother and children.
Extended family - The extended family consists of the father, mother, children and other relatives.
Single parent family - It consists of the father and children or the mother and children.
- Single parent families could be as a result of death of one spouse, separation or divorce. Also, some women choose to have children without getting married.
(Proverbs 19:14, 31, Matthew 1:18 - 25)
- Marriage is a legally recognised agreement between a man and a woman thus making them husband and wife.
a) Maturity – ensure you are both of age to manage a family.
b) Family background – make sure you are not related.
c) That you are both hard workers.
d) That you both respect each other.
e) The opinion of sincere people about your relationship.
f) That you are both God-fearing individuals.
(Mark 10:9)
1. Permanence
2. Is monogamous
3. Security
4. God’s blessings
5. Promotes a sense of belonging
(Genesis 24:1 - 19)
A successful marriage requires good choice in a marriage partner.
Factors to consider include religious back-ground, culture, interests, age, family back-ground, academic and economic status.
All these ensure that the individuals know what to expect from each other and whether or not each can live with the other in harmony.
Abraham stressed that Isaac was not to marry a foreigner.
Abraham prayed that God would give Isaac a good wife.
The factors he considered were a hard working woman who is pure, generous and beautiful.
When we get married, we should ask God for guidance.
The essential needs of a family include physical, social and spiritual needs.
Physical needs include food, water, shelter and clothing.
Social needs include the need for security, assurance, love, acceptance and self-esteem.
Spiritual needs include the need to worship God freely.
Human beings cannot live on bread only, but also need the word of God.
We should appreciate the needs of the family and work to provide them.
- Obstacles that undermine a good marriage include;
Unfaithfulness.
Alcohol and drug abuse.
Lack of concern for each other’s well-being.
Lack of reliance on God.
- God values the marriage institution.
- When God has joined a couple in marriage, nobody should separate them.
- Human beings should safeguard marriage at all costs.
Love was shown in action not words. It was expressed in songs and dances, and in the sharing of food, work and games.
Love could also be expressed in the amount of dowry a man paid for his wife.
Sex before marriage was forbidden in the traditional African community.
Girls who got pregnant before marriage were married off to old men as third or fourth wives, if at all.
Courtship took place only between mature boys and girls. The meeting opportunities include occasions such as traditional dances and wedding ceremonies.
One way of getting a marriage partner was by using a go-between.
Marriage was an obligation for all; it was a stage of life.
Marriage was for protection, it showed a sense of responsibility on the partners and it enabled one to take up new duties and roles in the society.
(Matthew 19:1 - 12, Ephesians 5:22, 28, 1 Corinthians 7, 13:4 - 7)
Courtship among Christians has to be carried out with maturity and purity.
The marriage institution was started by God. He saw that Adam was lonely, so He gave him a suitable helper and companion; Eve.
Love and faithfulness form the cornerstone of Christian marriages.
The head of the family is the husband and he should love his wife just as the Lord loves the church.
Wives should submit to their husbands as to the Lord.
God says He hates divorce.
Paul taught that due to high levels of immorality and the weakness of the flesh, everyone should marry.
He however added, that no one is obligated to marry.
Those who do not are able to dedicate themselves to the work of the Lord better than those who have family concerns.
A widow can get remarried to a Christian husband and so can a widower to a Christian wife.
The Bible says that God is concerned about the marriage institution and is ready to provide a suitable partner for us if we ask Him (Proverbs 19:14).
A Christian marriage should be lived according to Christian teachings and standards.
(1 Samuel 2:18 - 19, Psalms 127:3, Matthew 19:13, 14)
To make the family happy, the parents should provide needs such as love, patience, understanding and forgiveness.
Good parents give children the space to grow up, they do proper planning when to have a new baby.
They correct, discipline and forgive their children when they go wrong and encourage them when they do well.
Sometimes they may punish them, and it is always fair. Remember even GOD punishes those who act contrary to His will.
Colossians 3:20, Ephesians 6:1 - 3
We should appreciate the things our parents or guardians do for us.
We have a responsibility to make our families happy.
We should share, play and help with the work at home.
We should also work hard in school to please our parents, it's a way of appreciating them.
When we pass exams we uphold the integrity of our parents.
It is the will of GOD that we pass exams.
Deutronomy 28:13
God commands us to obey and respect our parents.
(Ephesians 4:26)
When members of the family are concerned about one another, there will be love, joy, peace and prosperity in the home.
A good family relationship promotes happiness, trust and friendship.
A bad relationship in the family leads to dis-unity and lack of concern for each other.
God wants us to be concerned and help others the way Jesus Christ did.
(1 John 4:7 - 8)
Jesus Christ showed His love for us by suffering and dying on the cross for us.
He did not seek revenge against those who tortured and ridiculed Him.
Members of the family should show love and concern for one another in sickness, sadness, trials or happiness.
We need to ask God to live in us so that His love for us may make us more loving towards others.
